The Christmas Quest, Poem 1999.

The Christmas Quest
By: Catrysa Quintopar Trakand

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Realm
There stood in the clearing one lonely elm

The stockings were hung from the mantles with care
The elm tree's druid had blooms in his hair

The populace was sleeping all snug in their beds
While visions of tourneys danced in their heads

When deep in the forest there arose such a clatter
The people all ran to see what was the matter

"Whoa Dasher! Whoa Dancer! Whoa Prancer and Vixen!
Stop there Comet, and Cupid, and Donner, and Blitzen!

Down there to the clearing, my faithful reindeer
I promised the missus an elm tree this year!"

He hopped from his sleigh and dug through his sack
And produced a wood axe which he strapped to his back

Out from the clearing the druid did shout
"Help everyone! There's a woodsman about!"

And so, with a cry, Silver Spire did charge
And rushed to aid the druid with the fat man at large...

To each separate base, the teams' steps did fall,
And when each team yelled, 'Ready,' the reeve made his call

With timing so perfect, like King's Knight takes Pawn
The reeve raised his hand to call out, "LAY ON!"

To the shouts of, "BA HUMBUG," the troops there were rallied
Sir Rue called for the surrender, which Santa did not heed

As the battle begun, Santa rubbed his hands with glee,
"No thanks, Your Majesty, I want that tree!"

Santa was generous with his sack of toys
Which he gave to all the young Silver Spire boys

To one young barbarian, new to the field
Santa gave a brand new axe from him to wield

Then to the centaur with orange fletched arrows
A new hackey sack that he can kick with his toes

Try as he might even Augustus did fall
And Santa gifted him with a shiny new ball

To Pendragon and Orin, a gift they could share
How sweetly they did cuddle their new teddy bear

Sir Rue was a good boy, an exemplary knight,
Santa made sure Rue's stocking was filled all right!

But to the druid, Santa did say,
"I just want one tree. Stay out of my way!

I made my great list, and I read through it twice,
But I found out you're naughty, you're not very nice!"

With a flash of cold anger, Santa then tried
To fill the druid's stocking, Lo, Santa cried,

"Blast you, silly tree-huggers, you could never be right,
Why don't you have a stocking tonight?"

"To keep you from filling it with coal," he replied
Then caused the great Santa with roots to be tied

Not five minutes later, after Santa was freed
There came cross the field the scent of cookies and mead

The young brave barbarian, new axe in his hand
Left a plate of cookies for Santa on the sand

Back and forth, the battle did sway
'Till Silver Spire drove him back to his sleigh

Heaving a sigh, with his elves all in flight,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"